I know how competitive it is. I know I’m getting old. I know its going to be hard but I just don’t believe that you believe that I know. Honestly it really is hard to know what the future has in store.  I know my end goal and where I am now and I’m happy with the rate I’m going. I’m actually happy with where i am for once but you telling me a bunch of arguments that Ive already posed in my head, is making me more doubtful and lowering the confidence that Ive built in my head. Life and the middle of this end plan is well… Its uncharted and sometimes you just can’t tell someone or pinpoint the exact time and place your gonna get things done. Its hard. Its an ongoing battle that I tell myself and find myself thinking about a lot. I have goals and dreams too and you can’t even fanthom the standards I hold myself so high too so you telling me what I’m doing wrong isn’t doing me any good. I know its only because you care but truthfully I’m taking my time because I’m scared of the future and my goals sometimes. Sometimes I feel like its too much, like I’m taking on too much and although I know I could do it, I just want to be left alone to deal with the upcoming and ongoing pressure. The support is great and I know you only say it because you care but choose your words please. I’d like to know your beside me instead of pushing me to the sharks. The future is scary so don’t make it anymore than it already is.